Initiative: Are you a self-starter or an order taker? Can you have too much initiative?
Click her for the reading: https://youtu.be/af-5PWCbS3s
PDF The Executive Gardener and the Fairy
I was raised by a family who was in overdrive with initiative, believing in the Just Do it!, Nike phrase. The supporting mantras were:
- Do something because you want to not because you have to.
- You made your bed now you have to sleep in it so take the time and effort to do it well, your best.
- Why put it off to tomorrow just get it done!
- What can I do to help?
- Share? Now over time my mom then would say I think I told you to share too much because now I’m telling you be careful people will take advantage of you. You share too much. Classic protection and fear for her child lol.
Could it be that we also were a family with a bit of ADHD? Lol
In the story Frank states at times he had too much initiative. In a previous blog I reflected on Liz Wiseman’s Multipliers and how too much initiative (often our actions that are intended to be helpful and loving) actually accidentally diminish another. That abundance of initiative can lead to over controlling behaviour, enabling others in dysfunctional behaviour and supporting victimization. As we say in Alanon, “Let Go Let God!”.
It’s rather funny in our family, although I would say both my parents were proponents of initiative, I will say that my mom was more of the procrastinator and was often harassed by my dad to take action. Her response was, “Frank would you stop bugging me!” Now more than ever I can see how her reserve at times was beneficial. I must say she was an example of patience.
What is the lesson? It’s about balance.
Dazzle’s Challenge: Try one of the games in this resourceful attachment with your family memebers:
https://freechild.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/01/gamesguide.pdf
Quick Take Away Links:
https://www.physicianscenter.org/parents/parenting-resources/articles/teaching-elementary-age-children-take-initiative/
